This story comes from a collection called “Roman Tales,” which was all about teaching people important lessons. Can you guess what the lesson is in this silly story?
The Gossips
A long time ago, where the edges of the Netherlands, Germany, and Belgium meet, there was a village. Everyone who lived there was a gossip, always telling tall tales about each other. Everyone, except a man named Gert. Gert and his wife Elga lived in the last house of a little street, with a row of houses all next to one another, and a large field on the other side where they farmed their food.
Gert was determined to show the villagers how foolish they were to gossip all the time. One night, he came up with a plan. He told Elga:
“My dear wife, I have a secret to tell you. But it is embarrassing, and I wouldn’t want anyone else to hear about it. If I could be sure you would keep my secret, I could tell you.”
Elga meant it when she sincerely told Gert:
“My dear husband, fear not: we are two, and so anything that hurts you would hurt me, too.”
“Well then,” said Gert, “you know that I have had a very sore tummy all day. Just now, I went to the toilet. But I didn’t poop. Can you imagine? Instead, a big, black crow came out of my bum, flew out the window, and into the field. I am so confused: how could such a thing happen?”
“Is it possible?” asked Elga. “But, husband, why should this trouble you? If I were you I would be happy that the crow that hurt my belly so, has flown away. It must have been very painful, having a bird in your bum.” With these kind words, Elga and Gert went to sleep.
As you can see, Elga was a good person; but like the other gossipy villagers, she couldn’t help herself. The next morning, she rushed over to the neighbours’ house. “My best friend,” she said, “may I tell you a secret?”
“Your secret is safe with me,” answered her friend.
“Well,” replied Elga, “a marvellous thing has happened to my poor husband. Last night he was extremely sick. But then he pooped out two great, black crows, feathers and all, which immediately flew away. Can you imagine?”
The neighbour patted Elga’s hand to reassure her. Then she hurried over to the next house, where she told the neighbours: “A most strange thing has happened to Gert, next door. Can you imagine? Last night he pooped out three crows!”
And so it went. By the time the tale had reached the last house in the row, it had grown to a report of very serious illness and many more crows. That afternoon, all the villagers came to Gert and Elga’s house, saying “poor Gert!” and “Sixty crows! can you imagine?”
With everyone before his door, Gert knew his plan had worked. He came outside and with a big smile said “My friends and neighbours, can you imagine how silly you all look? My bum is just like all of yours, and we all know what comes out!”